I don’t usually stoop to writing restaurant reviews, but the Short Cellar will make an exception this week for Marc Thuet’s flagship restaurant, Conviction (609 King Street West). The exception is amply merited since Conviction is Toronto’s only law-themed restaurant (besides, of course, the excellent Law Society).
 
Conviction is law-themed because its kitchen and wait staff are composed entirely of recently paroled ex-cons. If this weren’t gimmicky enough, the restaurant also is the subject of a reality TV program called Conviction Kitchen (view the histrionic trailer here).
 
The website for the show exclaims, “What do you get when you take one of the country’s top chefs, throw in 24 ex-cons with no culinary experience, and give them just three weeks to open a high-end restaurant from scratch?” After eating at Conviction, I can definitively answer this question: You get bad food, high prices and an extortionate wine list.
 
Marc Thuet is celebrated as one of Toronto’s culinary superstars, especially when he plays to his strengths: baking and Alsatian cuisine. But he is also accused of being inconsistent, and Conviction takes this failing to a new low. For instance, I ordered a pairing of tenderloin and beef short ribs for $45. It sounded delicious but arrived overdone and gristly — two pieces of meat which should be so different in character where baked into indistinguishable grey pucks.

But how's the wine list? That, and so much more, after the jump.

More than once, I have discovered — at my peril — that Valentines Day can creep up with very little warning. So this week, I am devoting the Short Cellar to the most romantic meal of all: fresh oysters on the half shell with chilled white wine. It is exotic, aphrodisiacal and surprisingly cheap.
 
It’s also an easy meal that you can prepare (and consume) virtually anywhere — your kitchen, a dorm room, a hotel, a romantically lit holding cell. You can find some decent instructions for shucking the oyster online, or watch an instructional video. I prefer my oysters with just a drop of lemon juice so that their natural flavour is preserved, but you can also garnish them with freshly grated horseradish, chili-sauce or shallot vinegar.
 
Fresh oysters can be found at restaurants and shops all over Toronto, but some of the best can be nabbed at places like Mike’s at the St. Laurence Market or from an oyster bar (like Starfish or Oyster Boy). An oyster like the delicious Malpeque goes for around $10-12/dozen at the Market. Unlike a lot of shellfish, oysters can live for a couple weeks in your fridge’s vegetable crisper (layered between damp sheets of newspaper), so don’t be afraid to get them a few days in advance.
 
What kind of wine matches oysters? That depends on what kind of oysters you’ve selected.

After the jump: Matching your mollusks with the perfect bottle of white.

This is the last in my series of articles looking at the 2007 vintage of one of Ontario’s premier wineries, Le Clos Jordanne. Here are my tasting notes for their complete range of Chardonnay — just like a winery in Burgundy, this is the only white grape they grow.

Le Clos Jordanne 2007 Village Reserve Chardonnay ($25.00, Vintages #33936)
The Village Reserve is once again an excellent value, especially since the increasing production of the vineyards has led Vincor to lower the price from $30 to $25. It has an intoxicating nose with plenty of blossoms, bruised tropical fruit and musk. The palate is lush and slightly sloppy: baked apple, yellow plum and papaya swirl around the glass. This is a luxurious and complex species of Chardonnay. 90/100

Le Clos Jordanne 2007 Talon Ridge Chardonnay ($37.00, Vintages #143974)
This is for lovers of fruit-driven Chardonnay: it has a generous hit of citrus and tropical flavours, all wrapped in a moderate layer of characteristic Le Clos oakiness. The nose is gorgeous and buttery, with a pleasing hint of candied ginger. It is a beautifully articulated wine: generous but also outrageously vivacious. 93/100

After the jump: notes on three more Le Clos 2007 Chardonnay varieties — including one sneak peek, one snapshot of that beautiful summer and one that Matthew calls "slightly perverse and close to perfect."

This is the second part of my series on the 2007 vintage of Le Clos Jordanne. Many wine critics (Tony Aspler, Beppi Crosariol and yours humbly) have gushed about what a great year 2007 was. Warm days throughout the summer and a dry autumn meant that the grapes ripened into juicy flavour bombs. Aspler has called it “the best Ontario vintage ever.” Ra, Ra, Siss-Boom, Ba.

That’s great for most grapes, but Pinot Noir is not like most grapes. Too much sunshine and light makes it bland and boring. Pinot grapes remind me of one of my ex-girlfriends: they thrive on just a little bit of suffering.

As a result, the skilled winemaking team at Le Clos had their work cut out for them. They parlayed the too-good weather into wines that are intense, concentrated and brooding. They may not have as much finesse as 2006, but all their intensity means that they will age beautifully.

After the jump: Matthew's ratings and tasting notes for the 2007 Le Clos wines.